It's no secret that we have a little Aaron Shust obsession in our house. In our defense we do have a little bit of a personal connection. He's an old high school friend of mine. If you haven't heard his music do yourself a favor and go ahead now and buy every album he has ever made. Because they are awesome and God-glorifying and you won't regret it.
Anyway. He released his first album in 2007 and one of the tracks is just a few short chords as an intro to another song. It says,
Give me words to speak,
Don't let my spirit sleep
Cause I can't think of anything worth saying
He developed that chorus into a song for a later album but it's those words just keep rolling through my head today.
I can't think of anything worth saying.
It's the easy way out for me. Not that the easy way is really easy. Life hurts right now. It's painful to be a part of. It's even more painful to watch. And the thing about it, is what is going on in our family is just a glimpse of the pain that this world is filled with. And it's just overwhelming to me. I want to crawl in a hole. I want to pretend that the hurt isn't there. The lost children. The miscarriages. The broken homes. The cancer. The loneliness. The hunger. The hurt. The darkness that threatens to consume us if we don't speak. If we let our spirits sleep.
So I won't take the easy way out.
I choose to praise Him today. To believe that He IS who He says He is. Because if He isn't, what in the world am I living for?
I choose life today. I choose light. I choose Jesus. Because when I don't have anything worth saying HE does. When I don't understand life, He says trust me.
I've always loved these verses in Isaiah 55..
Right now life doesn't make sense. But knowing that I can't know the mind of God is a comfort. Somehow over the years I missed verse 2 and it's speaking for me.
Give me words to speak Lord.