Monday, January 17, 2011

Dear Diary

In preparation for our move (more to follow on that in another post!) I've been slowly cleaning the house.  We don't live in a particularly large house and neither of us has a penchant for collecting things, however, our house seems to.  Wouldn't it be nice if you could put that on your criteria for new homes.....fenced in yard, garage, electric stove, doesn't collect junk....that house would sell like hotcakes!
Anyway, while I was going through our bookshelves in the basement (yes we have a basement in Charleston) I found two old "quote books" that I made in the mid 90's.  I started these books when my first boyfriend and I broke up.  I remember pretty much thinking that my life was OVER and that I would never love anyway again.  To help me make it through the rest of my years I started these quote books that I would read and add too whenever my heart was just breaking again.

There is actually some great stuff in these books.  I have quotes, songs, bible verses, poems...pretty much anything you can think of.  I'll save the serious ones for another post because it talks about my favorite Bible character; Saul.  Not Saul/Paul.  King Saul.  Saul you ask?  Yep, Saul.  You'll have to stay tuned to find out why.

While you wait though here are some of the funnier things from my "quote books".

"Never deprive someone of hope-it may be all they have"  This isn't a funny quote but looking back now wasn't I being a little dramatic?? I was 15!! Its a good thing I've toned down all that dramaticness in my life.  I can hear you laughing.  Stop laughing!!

"If you lose something let it go.  If it comes back to you it's your forever.  If it doesn't it never was." Oh really? 

"We agreed that it was over
Now the lines have all been drawn
The vows we made began to fade (ok clearly hadn't made vows when I was 15 but whatever)
And now they're gone
Put your pictures in a shoe box, your gold ring in a drawer
I'm not supposed to love you anymore"
(from Bryan White's "I'm Not Supposed to Love You Anymore")

"Unbreak my heart
Say you love me again
Undo this hurt that you caused when you walked out of the door and out of my life
Uncry these tears I've cried so many nights
Unbreak my heart"
(Toni Braxton, "Unbreak My Heart")

These are probably WAY funnier to me as I read them 15 years later but I had to share regardless.  I do remember feeling at the time that I was sure I would NEVER EVER love anyone ever again in my life.  I don't deny a special love for that sweet 14 year old boy, but it certainly wasn't what I found a decade (plus) later!  As you get older your perspective changes and thankfully we are able to look back on past hurts and pains with laughter.  There are definitely times in life when whatever is happening at the time seems so overwhelming that we think life will never be the same again.  And sometimes it isn't.  Sometimes it takes a while before we feel "normal" again.  Sometimes we just have to adjust to a new normal and more often than not it is painful.

I'll leave with with a couple of quotes that are a little more helpful in the "dealing with what life has handed you currently" area.  These are courtesy of the quote book as well but all the credit goes to the Good Book.

The Lord your God is with you
He is mighty to save
He will take great delights in you
He will quiet you with his love
He will rejoice over you with singing
Zephaniah 3:17
*Isn't it wonderful to serve a God who is MIGHTY to save?  I love that line!!

I will give you a new heart and put a new Spirit in you;
I will remove from you our heart of stone an give you  heart of flesh.
And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws.
Ezekiel 36:26-27

O Lord, you are my God;
I will exalt you and praise your name
for in perfect faithfulness
you have done marvelous things,
things planned long ago.
Isaiah 25:1
*Isn't this verse great?  I copied this into my book 15+  years ago wondering what God's plan was for my life. 

Childish or not, my heart hurt, and I hoped I would someday be blessed with a wonderful husband and eventually a family.  How awesome to know that the mighty God, who rejoices over me, who moves me to follow him had already planned marvelous things for me!!

1 comments:

Renee Ann said...

I, too, keep notebooks of quotes and verses but didn't begin mine until I was older. Still, it's fun to look back and see what I was struggling with and how God answered. Love your site! I'm visiting from iFellowship. (I blog at http://reneeannsmith.com/) Blessings!

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